Best one liners for online dating

24 Feb

I didn’t really know where to start so I thought I’d trawl the internet.After a couple of hours I‘d found some really, really good stuff.The very first and very last time that my wife is going to let me speak on behalf of both of us. Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention!I heard there was a sweep stake on the length of the best mans speech. No seriously this speech will be a bit like Clive short and not very funny…..If you find yourself on the market in your 40s, wading into the app-dating world can feel daunting.There are literally hundreds of apps to choose from, and if you’re a busy guy looking for something meaningful, scrolling through an endless stream of music-festival selfies probably isn’t the best use of your time.We are looking for all sorts of one-liners, quotes, sayings, proverbs, jokes and even puns, T-shirt one-liners and bumper stickers. To compile the TOP 100 funny one-liners we need your help. The vote-box contains a few numbers, a thumbs-up button and a thumbs-down button.

By clicking on the thumbs-down button you can indicate that you dislike the one-liner. The difference between the up- and down-votes will be shown in the big box on the left of the vote-box.Now if, by chance, what everyone else is saying about themselves really does explain who *you* are, explain this within your online dating service profile - but don't use it as an opening line. One of the most memorable online dating profiles, for me, housed a picture of a man wrestling a blow-up alligator.Another favorite showed a gentleman on a plane that looked like it was about to crash, with an opening line that said, "No, You DON' T Know What Excitement Is! Why did I only make an effort to initiate contact with those three, instead of any others? What made those three online dating service profiles stand out?Home of the TOP 100 funny one-liners, sayings, quotes, jokes and proverbs! You can view random funny one-liners by using our one-liner randomizer.Are you a fan of famous quotes, funny one-liners, cute sayings, english proverbs or just plain silly short jokes? It serves you with a random selection of funny one-liners.To avoid seeming 'just like everyone else' on these online dating services, make sure to take a look at your competition, first. Do a search for a person "like" you (age, sex, race, religion, etc.) More than likely, a couple of similarities will pop out immediately.Avoid using any one-liners you find, no matter how compelling they sound.It always settles the nerves when you get a laugh so here’s a few best man speech jokes and one liners to give you a bit of inspiration.You will obviously have your own style and sense of humour so you may wish to adapt or not use at all!